Packing Up

Over the past seven months, there have been a lot of ups and downs. Coming to college was a whole different experience for me, and far different than what I expected it to be. Now, that I sit and pack up my dorm room, I am actually pretty happy to be going back home for the summer. Although it is nice to live on my own and do whatever I want whenever I want, I don’t have anyone here at college to do that with besides my boyfriend. I haven’t met anyone new that I can honestly call a “friend”, which is disappointing.

 I expected to be dreading the day of move out, anticipating to be missing all of my new friends. Now that it’s here, I can’t wait until I get to go home and see my actual friends and start my new job at the YMCA. I can’t wait to be able to experience all of the fun things planned for the summer; Wisconsin dells road trip, Eric Church concert, Rascal Flatts concert, State Fair, Valleyfair, the beach, going up north to the cabin, and many more.

The thing I’m looking forward to the most, though, is being able to start fresh next year.  I won’t have to live in the disgusting dorms, and, better yet, I won’t have to live on the Saint Paul campus. I will be living on campus in the apartments, with (hopefully) my own room with only one roommate. I will be able to start fresh with classes, because this year has been nothing less than stressful. I will hopefully have a good job, because second semester I was unable to work. I am really looking forward to being able to start fresh. I want that to count as my “freshman year” because I hope to meet new people, and just try to forget about the bad year I had this past year.

I have learned that through this past year, being so close to home has really gotten me through the year. My boyfriend, Evan, is nothing less than awesome. I’m glad that I chose to go to the same college as him, and I don’t know what I would’ve done without him to lean on. During this past semester, I have able to go home every Friday. I have been volunteering in my home school district with some amazing kids. The experience is truly amazing. After I get done volunteering, I get to stop at home and usually eat a home cooked meal or go out to eat with my family. I have become a lot closer with my mom.

Looking back, I have realized that just because I haven’t met new people at college, the relationships I had before I came here have only grown stronger. I have also learned that the kids I volunteer with are truly my new friends. They have filled the “new friendships from college” spot, in my mind. 

Weird Dreams

This past week was a very relaxing week for me, but also a very exciting one, which is why I think I had such a weird dream on Wednesday. Before I talk about the dream, here’s some background to understand more about my week prior to having the dream:

To start off the week, Monday afternoon, my friend Carrie told me about how my favorite band, Rascal Flatts, was coming to the State fair in August. That night I decided that no matter what we were going to go, since I hadn’t been able to go their concert the last time they came to Minneapolis.

On Tuesday, my boyfriend and I decided to go get a smoothie from Caribou and sit there for a little bit while doing homework. After talking a little bit, we decided to use his Ticketmaster gift card to go to a concert in May (a somewhat birthday present to me :) ), since we couldn’t use it for the Rascal Flatts concert in August (since the tickets weren’t available through Ticketmaster). We decided to go to one of my favorite singers concert, Eric Church, who is also coming with another country artist, Brantley Gilbert.

Wednesday night, before I went to bed, I began thinking about how excited for this summer’s coming concerts. As I doze off to sleep, I began to dream (this is from my point of view):

I am sitting in the upper deck of the Xcel Energy Center… but wait, my tickets are for upper deck at the target center?
Weird… oh well.
Oh! Yay! The concert is starting!
“RASCAL FLATTS! WOOO! I LOVE YOU!”
..Wait, I thought I was at the Eric Church concert…? Oh well, Rascal Flatts is fine with me!
…pause. No way.
He’s coming to our section!? NO WAY.
He’s walking down the aisle right now, getting closer and closer to me.. OH MY GOSH HE’S COMING TOWARDS ME!
“GARY, CAN I HAVE A HUG!?”
HE’S ACTUALLY HUGGING ME AND SINGING AT THE SAME TIME. OH MY GOSH EVERYONE IS LOOKING AT ME!!!
“EVAN, TAKE A PICTURE OF US!!!”
I can’t believe this is happening to me right now! He’s singing the whole song while just hugging me! AH!

Boom, reality. I woke up. Honestly, this dream was one of the weirdest one’s I’ve ever had. Obviously the excitement for the coming concerts was getting to my head, but I didn’t realize that I would be so obsessive in my dreams about it! It is really odd what our minds come up with while we are sleeping, especially something so extreme!

I also thought it was funny how much the events mixed together; I was at the venue that I had been at when I saw a completely different concert about 2 years ago, in the seats that I’m going to have for a concert coming up in May at a different venue, along with a completely different band that is going to be outdoors when performing. 

"I Hope You Dance"

"I hope you never lose your sense of wonder

You get your fill to eat but always keep that hunger

May you never take one single breath for granted

God forbid love ever leave you empty-handed

I hope you still feel small when you stand beside the ocean

Whenever one door closes I hope one more opens

Promise me that you'll give faith a fighting chance

And when you get the choice to sit it out or dance

I hope you dance"

Lyrics from the song I Hope You Dance by Lee Ann Womack.

These lyrics have really had a huge impact on my life. I have known the song for several years, since the time it first came out. Although I knew the song, I hadn’t really looked into the lyrics. The reason I looked into the lyrics and have now had the phrase “I hope you dance” tattooed on my foot, is because of my friend Sierra.

In the summer of 2009, my friend Sierra was in a car accident. Her and I weren’t very close friends, but it was still a very shocking experience, especially since some of my friends were very close with her. She was in the back seat of her friend’s car when he turned a residential street corner going 90 MPH. As soon as he turned the corner, he hit a parked car. They bounced off of the parked car, spun about a block down the street, and hit a light pole. Sierra was said to have been ejected from the car due to impact (according to police), but the passenger in the car said that they had pulled her out because they thought that the car was going to explode. When police and paramedics got there, Sierra was laying on a slab of cement about 15 feet away from the car…lifeless. Sierra died that night around 10:08, just minutes after the accident happened. I remember that night so vividly. I had been laying in my bed looking out the window and it had started to rain… as if it were a sign that something had happened. I looked at my phone and it was about 10:15. I was up late for some reason, and I was texting my boyfriend. Around midnight he got the news from another friend of ours, and then texted me with the words “Jess, Sierra’s dead!” I was in complete shock and couldn’t believe what I was reading. When I woke up the next morning I was immediately in tears.

About a week later her wake and funeral were held. It was an open casket wake, which was very eerie and hard to look at. She didn’t look like herself; all of the make-up covering the scars just put a bad last impression of her in my head. As bad as it may sound, I wish I hadn’t went to see her.. I wanted to remember her looking like herself.  As the ceremony went on, they started to play a slideshow of pictures with the song “I Hope You Dance” playing. It fit her so well; being the cheerleader and dancer that she was. It really hit me emotionally, and it played in my head for months. To this day, I sing the song every time it comes on the radio or my iTunes/iPod.

Along with the lyrics tattooed on my food, I got 4 stars; Pink for Sierra, Green for my grandpa (who passed away about a year and a half after Sierra), my aunt Sue (who had died when I was younger), and my hockey coach, Chris Johnson, who died just a little less than a year ago.

Whenever I look down at the tattoo on my foot, I remember that they’re with me and remind me of the words to this song. It reminds me that I can get through anything, because they didn’t get the opportunity to. It reminds me to stay strong.

"The Hunger Games" movie review

Some friends and I went to see the movie “The Hunger Games” on Saturday evening. The movie stars Jennifer Lawrence, Josh Hutcherson, Liam Hemsworth, and many other actors and actresses. I hadn’t read the book before seeing the movie, and, to be honest, I didn’t have any idea what it was even about. Although it wasn’t my favorite type of movie, it was surprisingly very good.

                Although it was good, the whole movie was a little weird to me.  It was pretty good in terms of scenery, but I guess I would have to read the book to completely understand the plot and the concept of the story. There’s a few times where the special effect of fire is seen, which looks very fake and kind of throws the scene off. There is a lot of blood, which I was also not a fan of. The thing that I disliked most about the movie, though, was how the camera was so shaky. During the action scenes, I felt like I had no idea what was going on because of the non-stop camera movements. It was very hard to focus on just one thing at a time when the camera kept moving the way that it did.

Aside from the negative aspects of the movie, the main characters, Katniss Everdeen (Jennifer Lawrence) and Peeta Mellark (Josh Hutcherson), had fantastic acting. They made the struggles and the love aspect of the movie really believable, and honestly kept me interested while the camera and special effects were distracting. The acting was very good overall, but I was a little disappointed that I didn’t get to see more of Gale Hawthorne’s (Liam hemsworth) role. At the beginning of the movie, it was kind of led on to believe that he was a huge part of the movie, but, in reality, we only see him for a total of about 15 minutes out of the whole movie. Again, though, I think that I would have had to have read the book to understand the entire meaning behind it.

The costumes and make-up were another thing that really caught my eye. They were put together very well and looked like they had taken a lot of time to get together. I really liked how they made sure of the small details in the make-up matching the outfits of the “leaders”. When the cameras did a close up, the make-up was consistent and flawless. I was pretty surprised on how well they did on this part of the movie.

Overall, I enjoyed the movie and it was worth the money to see. Although I didn’t know much about the movie or the story before I had gone to see it, it turned out to be better than I had expected it to be. There were a few bad aspects to the movie, but all in all, the movie was very good!

"21 Jump Street" movie review.

Recently I went with some friends to see the movie “21 Jump Street”. This movie stars Jonah Hill, Channing Tatum, and Brie Larson (along with many others). Overall the movie was a lot better than I expected. It was very funny and kept me interested the whole time.

The movie starts off based in 2007 with two teenagers in high school anticipating the upcoming prom. Schmidt (Jonah Hill) is considered in the “out” group, whereas Jenko (ChanningTatum) is considered to be in the “in” group. Schmidt tries to work up to courage to ask the girl of his dreams out on a date, but then realizes that she is embarrassed to be asked by him, and sees that Jenko and his friends are laughing at it all. Later we see that Jenko is no longer allowed at prom, because of his terrible grades. There is a moment at the end of this scene where they are both are tearing up outside of the school and look at each other, as if they feel each other’s pain.

The movie jumps ahead see Schmidt walking into training for work at the police station (he is older now). He glances up to see Jenko. As they go through the training process they become very close, and become best friends. They get fired from their park patrol job and sent to a program located in a building with the address 21 Jump Street.

Once getting to this building, they get assigned a task together; they are to go back to high school and find the source of drug dealing around the school. They are told to not get in trouble, no hooking up with girls from the school, and to not inform anyone that they are undercover cops. Once at the school they get each other’s schedules; Schmidt gets the easy classes, while Jenko gets the advanced, hard classes.

Eventually they adjust to these friend groups-- the opposites of what they were when they were in high school – and eventually find the dealer of the drugs. Although they find the dealer, they do not find the person making the drug. After getting expelled from the school (because they end up fighting at the school play), they decide to go to prom anyway because they think they have a lead on the case. The dealer then brings them upstairs to a hotel room and shows them the supplier; the high school gym teacher. Eventually they end up making their first arrest and feeling very accomplished

Although this isn’t even half of what happens in the movie, it was very good overall. The only thing that I did not like about the movie was that there was a lot of unnecessary blood during the hotel room/car chase scene. Otherwise, I really suggest going to see this movie!

Baton Twirling

I started twirling baton at the age of 7. I had done gymnastics before I started baton, but decided to try something new and found the program through the local community center. The team/program was called the Suzettes. When I started, I didn’t realize it would become so much a part of me, and I didn’t realize how big of an impact it had on my life until after I wasn’t twirling anymore.

I stared off at the lowest level, by just learning the basics as well as doing some gymnastics and dancing along with it. I stared off doing little things like somersaults, stretching a lot, learning how to simply throw it up and catch it. After about two years of doing that, I joined the team aspect of it. After being on the team for a few months and learning a routine, I went to my first competition.

After the first competition I was hooked; I started doing individual lessons, as well as team, and became close to the girls that were in the program. I continued to do competitions and build up my skill level. It took a while to win one, but I finally did. The feeling I got when I won was unbelievable.

After a few years of being with the program, times got tough.  Out of the two locations, only one was left open (one was located in Crystal, Minnesota and the other in Spring Lake Park, Minnesota. The Crystal one remained open). As well as one location closing, a lot of the girls became old enough to go off to college, so the whole program dwindled down to only a few.

Around the beginning of 2009, (including me) there were a total of six left in the program, whereas before there were around twenty-five. Most of the previous girls had moved, gone off to college or decided that the drive to Crystal wasn’t worth it. Although the numbers were low, though, we stayed alive. Around the same time (in 2009) our head coach had some serious health issues, and decided that she wasn’t healthy enough to coach anymore. So, we were left looking for a new team coach. We found a new coach (who was a previous team member of ours and a previous coach of mine) and competed in a few competitions, but we soon found out that she had become pregnant and wouldn’t be coaching us for much longer, either.

Shortly after finding out the news of our new coach being pregnant, (in 2010) I decided that I needed to choose between hockey and baton twirling. I chose hockey, but I didn’t realize what an impact that would make on my life. The girls continued twirling, but soon a few others dropped out until only about three were left. Looking back now, I wish I had continued on with baton. I was so close to the girls that I twirled with; we had grown up together. I decided to choose hockey, but I know in my heart that I could’ve done both.

Lately, I’ve been thinking about twirling a lot. Luckily, a girl I twirled with (who quit around the same time I did) is attending the U of M as well. We have both talked, and are hoping to get back in the gym and twirl just for fun. And, honestly, I’ve never been so excited to go to the gym.

Country Music

Country music has so many meanings behind it, and I honestly don’t know where I’d be today if I hadn’t ever listened to it. I know that people say that a lot about all types of music, but to me, country is different than all of the genres.  I can relate to country music in more ways than just through the lyrics, but through experiences I’ve been through with it.

My dad was born and raised up north, so we used to visit my grandparents a few times a year at their home up in Duelem, Minnesota. I remember when I was little, my dad would always play country music in his big white truck while we drove to see my grandparents. Whenever we pulled down the old dirt road, I knew we were almost there. The little white house with the huge yard and garden in the back was the indication that we had arrived. When we got inside, there was always the smell of the meal grandma was preparing – it was a rule that you couldn’t leave the house anything less than stuffed.

                My cousins and I would go out in the backyard and run around and play many games, while also looking at the huge garage where my grandpa stored his beloved tractors; John Deere, to be exact. He would tell us stories about them as he was half asleep, but eventually wake up from his cat nap and take us on rides. The smell of the tractor running while mixed with the country air was just so satisfying. I deep down that I’ve always been a country girl at heart.

                The days would come to an end and it was time to say our goodbyes. I didn’t get to see my grandparents very often, so it was always a bitter sweet moment walking out the door. But, the hardest time walking out of that door was when the house was sold after my grandpa passed away. After pulling away in the truck, headed back down the dirt road, with tears in my eyes, the country radio station would come on and I would venture back to the city with only memories left.

                I feel as though country music has filled the place in my heart of truly being a country girl. Although I can’t live in the country, I can always listen to the music that reminds me of the sights, smells, tractors, and feeling that I got when I was up there. I can listen to country music and feel my grandpa stopping by to say “hi” from heaven, as well as listen to the songs about all of the other angels up there with him.  I can listen to something completely opposite of that- something about love or about friendship.  Either way, country music has a song for my mood.  I know that other types of music give people the same type of feelings, but the type that gives me that “feeling” just so happens to be country music, and I wouldn’t trade that for the world.